this is all very very new to me .. but i have one question that really concerns me .. is it normal to have un assisted orgams during sex or even afterwards?

I guess it depends on what you mean by unassisted. :)

If you're talking about achieving orgasm through something other than manual stimulation of your cock/clitty, then absolutely . . . but only if you're one of us lucky gurls who are comfortable enough in our gender and our sexuality to let ourselves go. If you're at all self-conscious or afraid of those feelings, it can be difficult to free your mind of the expectation that only 1 kind of manual stimulation can result in orgasm.

Personally (and it's different for each gurl) I have come to prefer those unassisted orgasms. Having my nipples sucked on and played with gives me the sweetest, softest, most subtle feelings of orgasm . . . I love those ones simply because they feel (to me, at least) so feminine.

It's when I'm being penetrated, though, that I achieve the most mind-blowing, earth-shattering unassisted orgasms. There's this slow build of pleasure inside you that carries you so far beyond the point where manual masturbation would result in orgasm, driving you to heights of pleasure so intense it's scary. I love how those orgasms seem to wash over me in waves (I can have several unassisted orgasms with the right lover), and how you never get that abrupt end to the pleasure that masturbation provides. You come away wholly satisfied and fulfilled, but still pleasantly aroused, and with an orgasmic buzz that can linger for hours.

Ask me anything . . . go ahead, make me blush!